Top 5 Best (And Worst) V/H/S Shorts
Since the release of The Blair Witch Project, the so-called “found footage” style of the horror genre has been a popular way of filming and creating new films and shorts. One of the most well-known (and arguably well-done) series of movies has been the V/H/S franchise.
Anthology horror uses different writers and directors, offering something different to horror lovers, especially since a viewer can watch numerous shorts and segments as opposed to one overarching plot. With the newest entry, V/H/S ’99, releasing on Shudder on October 20th of 2022, it only seems fair to look at some of the more impactful segments of the previous four movies, whether they provide chills and scares or humor and cheesiness.
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With that, here’s a list of the top five best (and worst) segments (not including wraparounds) from the V/H/S series up to V/H/S ’94!
5th Best: Slumber Party Alien Abduction (V/H/S 2)
Image Source: extmovie.com
What’s scarier than having your little brother crash your slumber party? Having a whole group of aliens crash it! And by ‘crash,’ I mean abduct you and your friends when you least expect it. What starts with a not-so-innocent prank war between siblings and their respective friend groups soon turns into a run for survival.
Slumber Party Alien Abduction uses its limited resources wonderfully, showcasing the simple yet terrifying premise of alien abduction. Since the event happens out of nowhere, the actors must portray their characters’ fear and desperation realistically, which they manage to do perfectly (even if, up close, the aliens look... less than realistic). It helps that, for most of the segment, the only camera footage is through the focal point of a camcorder mounted onto the family dog. The shakiness and sudden blurriness of movements add to the realism due to the believably erratic nature of animals. The terrifying realism of the acting makes this segment stand out as the fifth best! However, for animal lovers unfamiliar with the short, let’s say be careful of the ending.
5th Worst: Second Honeymoon (V/H/S)
Image Source: Diabolique Magazine
Have you ever found interest in watching a married couple have uncomfortable, tense arguments and awkward moments that can only be described as ‘the first signs of a failed marriage’? If yes, then Second Honeymoon might be the segment for you. As suggested by the title, this short takes place from the view of the husband recording his second honeymoon with his wife, with all of the usual twists and turns that can make the viewer feel awkward and uneasy. The discomfort levels only ramp up when an unseen third party begins to butt in, unbeknownst to the married couple, leading to more unrest between them.
Truth be told, this is far from a bad entry. If anything, it perfectly encapsulates the disquiet and tension in a rocky relationship, with the added bonus of having a creepy stalker attempt to throw monkey wrenches into their lives. Ironically, its weakness stems from the fact that it’s so... normal. If someone found this video on a discarded VHS tape, it’d surely give the viewer a lot of chills. Compared to other entries in the V/H/S franchise, the tense realism tends to fall flat, and a boring yet predictable ending doesn’t help, either. Again, a good segment, but possibly the weakest out of the first movie.
4th Best: Storm Drain (V/H/S’ 94)
Image Source: Horror Obsessive
We all like a good folklore tale. The more obscure and local, the better! While the stories and legends can be fun, this next segment about an infamous local cryptid, known as the “Ratman,” shows what can happen when your curiosity gets the better. A news reporter and her cameraman go spelunking the nearby sewer system, hoping to do a story about the creature. They soon discover that the rabbit hole is deeper (and smellier) than they thought.
Overall, an exciting watch and the perfect segment to whet your whistle when starting V/H/S ’94. The acting is top-notch, the atmosphere is chilling, and even the “Ratman” is a freaky figure to behold, as the practical effects continue to impress in terrifying ways.
4th Worst: Tuesday The 17th (V/H/S)
Image Source: Roobla
What would happen if you took The Blair Witch Project and made all the characters insufferably immature? You’d get this segment, most likely. When a group of four friends decides to head deep into the woods on a “vacation,” they soon reveal that one is carrying an ulterior motive. A strange one, at that.
It’s still relatively hard to say this is a “bad” segment, but it’s easy to see that the visual effects and acting drop in quality, albeit very slightly. The most fun part about the movie, aside from the hammy acting, is how many twists the story takes, leaving the viewer curious about what happens next. But, of course, an unpredictable story can still turn people away, as they may feel as if the story didn’t have a good enough payoff. Terror is subjective, after all!
3rd Best: Ride In The Park (V/H/S 2)
Image Source: V/H/S Wiki
“Zombie apocalypse.” There’s a very high chance that you’ve seen or at least heard about a film or TV series that has featured such an idea. As you might’ve guessed, this segment showcases another take on the idea. While riding in the park on his bike, a rider wearing a Go-Pro on his helmet comes across a wounded woman, screaming for help. Unfortunately, his kindness gets the better of him when it turns out that there is a horde of zombies quickly closing in around him. You’d think the short would end as the biker quickly becomes overwhelmed from an injury and dies, but you’d think wrong. Instead, the audience watches the hilarious antics of a zombie trying to find prey.
Surprisingly and welcomingly humorous, Ride in the Park showcases a fresh look at a zombie’s thought process would be. And unlike the last movie, we don’t have to hear annoying adults for half of the short.
3rd Worst: Phase 1 Clinical Trials (V/H/S 2)
Image Source: V/H/S Wiki
Sometimes, a good ghost story doesn’t need a complicated premise to grab the viewer’s attention. But, sometimes, it can be convoluted! For example, phase 1 Clinical Trials shows the story of a man who gets an artificial eye implanted into his skull after a car accident. Because the eye is in an experimental stage, it’s said to go through ‘glitches,’ with the eye recording what the man sees to record its success. The glitches in question, however, lead the man to be able to see the dead.
Despite the rather mediocre story having a pretty decent payoff, the segment itself suffers from the fate of having many of the ‘scares’ be on par with jump-scares with audio stings, which can ruin the immersion of the setting, which is already far from believable. But hey, at least there’s plenty of gratuitous nudity!
2nd Best: Amateur Night (V/H/S)
Image Source: Sci-Fi Now
When people think of V/H/S, one of the first segments that may pop into their head is Amateur Night, and for a good reason. Taking place at night, a group of friends brings their sexually inexperienced friend out on a bar crawl, hoping to hook him up with someone. To help memorialize the occasion, they attach a hidden camera into the frame of his glasses to help record everything. However, when a strange girl starts hanging around them, the night slowly but surely becomes a nightmare.
With a tightly written story, terrifying practical effects, and a gripping atmosphere, it’s no wonder this segment became popular. So much so that the directors of the short went on to make a whole film dedicated to the monster (called SiREN).
2nd Worst: Bonestorm (V/H/S Viral)
Image Source: Bloody Disgusting
With a name like Bonestorm, this segment is bound to be pretty badass, right? Sadly, it doesn’t seem to be the case here, as there’s very little that works in this segment’s favor. A group of skaters and a hired cameraman travel to Tijuana to get some ‘sick videos’ of them skateboarding. It isn’t long before they accidentally interrupt a cult’s ritual and are forced to fight their way out.
Unfortunately, most shots are sloppily filmed between different helmet cameras and the cameraman himself, with too many camera cuts and an obnoxious soundtrack that plays over certain scenes. Plus, the ‘fighting sequence’ that occurs merely slows the short’s progression, and none of the cultists are terrifying.
Fortunately, one good segment features a much more terrifying cult and is arguably the best segment out of the franchise.
1st Best: Safe Haven (V/H/S 2)
Image Source: V/H/S Wiki
It’s not an easy task to talk about this segment without giving too much away. However, I can say that it features a small film crew wanting to create a documentary about an Indonesian cult, with shots and interviews taking place inside the building where they gather.
...and that’s all I’ll say about the plot. It’s worth the watch, though if you’re not a fan of intense situations (such as suicide) and heartstoppingly realistic effects, you may want to skip this one. For those interested, however, it’s evident that the story’s escalation, the acting, and the scares are utterly terrifying. No argument that Safe Haven is one of the best shorts that the numerous filmmakers of V/H/S have to offer.
1st Worst: Dante The Great (V/H/S Viral)
Image Source: CineFiles Reviews
Ironically, Dante The Great is also a fake documentary, although the production crew is not the main character this time around. Instead, we see the life of Dante, a poor, awful street magician out in the middle of nowhere. After stumbling upon “Houdini’s cape,” Dante finds himself able to perform real magic and quickly grows famous.
Due to the segment presenting as more of a realistic documentary, it tends to get away with more “creative” ideas, such as having music over the top of scenes. Unfortunately, the story itself could be better written, as the suspension of belief floats away higher than a hot air balloon right around the midpoint of the segment. Even the scares seem weak, and the twists are predictable. The worst part has to come from the laughably silly climax, as it looks like the directors of the short forgot that V/H/S is a found footage anthology.
Regardless of whatever you think about these segments and those not listed here, know that the V/H/S franchise is still a great watch, and you’ll never be bored watching any of the shorts.
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Source(s): Wikipedia
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